What are the worst first dates a guy can take a woman on? Should we put our 6-year-old son on medication for attention problems? How can you make your wife feel good about her appearance? How can I deal with my “fun” 4-year-old when I’m serious all the time?
Dead on with the ADHD comments. I had been diagnosed growing up. Later on a “much older” doctor I talked to about it put it like this.
100 years ago, you never heard about things like ADHD because it’s only recently we expect people to sit down for several hours and focus on one person or task at a time. Some people are okay with that, they are disciplined enough to pay attention to something for along time. Back then you worked on a farm doing multiple things or only sat in class for a few hours. It wasn’t a problem because they didn’t place the same expectations on kids they do today, and they don’t let kids learn in a hands on way that is applicable and interesting because that takes more effort and time.
I was on put on drugs when I was younger too, I took myself off of them when I accidentally took to many one morning. I went in and out of “special classes” because teachers didn’t want to deal with the one kid who didn’t learn like 90% of the rest of class and put me in with kids who had real issues. My problem was a bit unique in that instead of acting up I would fall asleep or day dream. Finally, my mom got wise and switched jobs and school system. I learned to cope as I got older, I learned to hone the way my brain worked to my advantage (people with ADD have the ability generally to focus very intensely on what they are most interested in). I was constantly told I was smart but I didn’t apply myself. I was notorious for passing or doing well on tests but failing or barely passing because I didn’t do my homework (in other words I was learning the material but quickly became bored with it and was ready to move on). Later on, I realized I wasn’t as “learning disabled” as I was made out to be, I just had an entirely different way of learning that as an independent adult I had the ability to explore. I became and autodidact (self learner). I put myself through college as an adult, I got into computers. I can say I’m as successful if not more successful then many of the kids I was in my class with, despite not having the best grades. I don’t have to sit still, I can switch tasks if one of the things I’m doing is boring me to death for a bit, I learned to discipline myself to pay attention to things I don’t necessarily want to.
I would read “Driven to Distraction” or “ADHD and Me: What I Learned from Lighting Fires at the Dinner Table”, look into resources like Khan Academy and hands on learning experiences. My personal opinion is that at 6 it’s too early to know what is best and I’d be very skeptical of drugs that young, the kid is going to grow up in a reality where his mental behavior is dictated by chemically altering his brain chemistry, how will he learn if he doesn’t need them, as teenager he’ll be able to tell if the drugs are better for him or not, at 6 he’s just going to go along with it regardless if its helping or not. Yeah the drugs may help the kid behave and be easier to deal with for the teacher, but is it going to help the kid learn?
The smartest people in the world, from Einstein, to Thomas Edison, etc show symptoms of ADHD if you read their history as and adult an early child, they fit the profile. Just because a kid has trouble sitting still doesn’t mean they’ll be failures, it just means they need somewhere to focus all that mental energy.
I believe if THOMAS ALVA EDISON didnt have ADHD, we would have still been using oil lamps and had to play an instrument to hear music—IMO
It’s also possible that many men have been chemically altered as boys and it could be a reason they arent doing as well in school or enrolling in colleges today–although girls have this ‘disorder’, it’s more common in boys